EXISTENCE

EXISTENCE
Existence is complex and intriguing. Coming from a Christian home that is more interested in morals than daily Christian religious rituals; to a secular primary school, then a Christian secondary school where a combination of religiosity and morality is taught. At the university level, there is a freedom of self-expression and learning of different ideologies from socialism to capitalism, to Africanism to Marxism, to Marxist Leninist and so on which quickly activates the cells and glands of activism. Having also been engrossed in Catholicism through pious societies, there is a fight in the being of which ideology should take dominance.

Then the further reading of history books makes it even more complex, from the history of slave trade to colonialism, to neo-colonialism and imperialism all targeted against the black man. Then echoes the question, who is the black man, and what is his purpose on earth? This question sends another round of battle among the inherent and learned ideologies. The questions of spirituality abound: Who is God? Why are the deities in Africa represented with a small “g” in god? Perhaps they are less powerful or we were told during colonialism and slave trade that they were less powerful. How do we even know anything about our spirituality and links to our ancestors when our artifacts were either burnt, vandalized, or looted by white supremacists? Another struggle begins again: go back to our spirituality or stick to the one from Europe and the Middle East. But again, there are pieces of evidence that the childhood God taught by Sunday school teachers is all-powerful.

Still contemplating faith, race, and political ideology, then a unique brand of partisan politics came to the fore: the Nigerian style which you have to call red-blue and blue-red. A contradiction from the initial moral and spiritual teachings. A weak link between God and Human Conscience. A tragic situation that is largely accepted by the religious people who are quick to invoke their deities as the most moral and the most holy. A double contradiction and irony of shame. Then appears a dilemma to subscribe to the unholy rules of Nigerian politics even if you want to change the situation to help the poor masses. At this point, the abnormality leads to more confusion. A people who claim their deity abhor evil and wrongdoings but can’t stand for what is right. It is either they have failed their God, or their God has failed them. Verily, existence is complex for a young Nigerian of good conscience.